Boy Tar Page 49

  CHAPTER FORTY NINE.

  A NEW DANGER.

  I remained in this state of insensibility for several hours, and was noteven troubled, as was usual when I slept, with painful dreams. I didnot dream at all; but, on awaking to consciousness, I had a dreadfeeling upon me, just as if I had been cast from off the earth intoinfinite space, and was rapidly floating onwards, or falling from somegreat height, without ever reaching a point of rest. It was a feelingof a most unpleasant kind--in fact, a feeling of horror.

  Fortunately, it did not continue long; and as I endeavoured to rousemyself it became less painful, and at length passed away. In its stead,however, I felt sick at the stomach, and my head ached as though itwould split. Surely it was not the sea that had made me sick? No, itcould not be that. I was long since hardened against sea-sickness.Even another storm would not have brought it on; but there was noparticular roughness. The ship was sailing under breezy but not stormyweather.

  Was it fever that had suddenly attacked me in a violent manner? or had Ifainted from want of strength? No; I had experienced both calamities,but this new sensation resembled neither.

  I was in reality at a loss to account for what was ailing me. In ashort time, however, my thoughts became clearer, and then the truthdawned upon my mind. I had been in a _state of intoxication_!

  Intoxication it must have been, though wine I had not tasted, nor brandyneither--not a mouthful. I disliked it _too_ much for that; andalthough there was plenty of it--or had been, for it was now all gone--enough to have drowned myself in, I was not conscious of having drunk adrop of it. True, a drop had passed into my mouth--a drop, or maybe aspoonful, had gone down my throat when the torrent gushed over me; butsurely this small quantity could not have produced intoxication, even ifit had been liquor ever so much _above proof_? Impossible; it could nothave been that that produced intoxication!

  And what, then? Something had made me _drunk_. Although I had neverbeen so in my life, yet I guessed the symptoms to mean only this.

  As I continued to reflect--that is, as I grew more _sober_--the mysterywas cleared up, and I discovered the cause of my intoxication. It wasnot brandy, but the "fumes" of brandy, that had done it--this, andnothing else.

  Even before entering the cask, I had noticed a decided change in myfeelings, for the fumes of the liquor, even outside, were strong enoughto make me sneeze; but this was nothing to the effluvia which Iencountered inside the vessel. At first I could scarcely breathe, butby little and little I became accustomed to it, and rather liked it. Nowonder, since it was making me feel so strong and happy!

  On cogitating further on this singular incident, I remembered how I cameto be outside the cask--how thirst had influenced me to come out; and Inow perceived how fortunate it was that I had followed the guidance ofthis appetite. I have said that I did not know whether I had actuallyquenched my thirst. I had no remembrance of going to the butt, or ofdrawing a cup of water. I think I did not get so far. Had I done so,in all probability I should have left out the vent-peg, and then a largequantity of water would have been spilled. The water-line would havebeen down to a level with the vent; and this, on examination, I gladlyperceived was not the case. Moreover, my drinking-cup felt too dry tohave been used lately. I had not drunk, then, and this was a fortunatecircumstance, though far more fortunate was the circumstance that I hadthirsted. Had it not been for this, I should no doubt have remainedinside the cask, and the consequence must have been disastrous indeed.I cannot say what, but certainly some fatal result would have followed.In all likelihood, I should have remained in a state of intoxication--how was I ever to get sober?--every moment getting worse, until when?Until death! Who knows?

  A mere accidental circumstance, then, had once more saved my life; butperhaps it was not accidental. It may have been the hand of Providence,and I believed so at the time. If prayers express gratitude, mine weregiven, and with all the fervour of my soul.

  Whether I had allayed my thirst or not, certain it was that thequenching had been but temporary; for I now felt as if I could drink thebutt dry. I lost no time in groping for my cup, and I am sure I did notleave off till I had drunk nearly half a gallon of water.

  The water removed a good deal of the sickness, and also cleared mybrains, as if it had washed them. Being once more restored to my propersenses, I returned to the consideration of the perils by which I wassurrounded.

  My first thought was about continuing the work I had so abruptly leftoff, and only now did it occur to me that I might not be able to go onwith it. What if I was to get into the same state as before--what if mysenses again became stupefied, and I should not have presence of mind orresolution to come out of the cask?

  Perhaps I might labour away for awhile without getting into the samestate, and if I felt it coming on me I could hasten out? Perhaps! Butshould it be otherwise? If the intoxication should come suddenly uponme, how then? How long had it been before I felt it on the formeroccasion? I tried to remember, but could not.

  I remembered how this strange influence had stolen over me--howsoothingly and sweetly it came, wrapping my senses as if in a delightfuldream. How it had made me reckless of consequences, forgetful even ofmy appalling situation!

  Supposing that all was to be repeated--the same scene to be enacted overagain--and only one incident to be left out: that is, the thirst whichbrought me forth from the cask--supposing all this? And why might itnot be just what would take place? I could not answer the question oneway or the other; but so strong were my apprehensions of the probabilitythat it might, that I hesitated _to re-enter the cask_!

  There was no help for it, however. I must either do so, or die where Ilay. If death in the end was to be my fate, better far, thought I, todie by this apparently easy mode; for I felt convinced, from theexperience I had had, that such death would be without a pang.

  The reflection emboldened me, as well as the knowledge that I had noalternative, no choice of plan; and again pronouncing a prayer, Icrawled back into the brandy-cask.